I used to think I was just bad at plants.
Every few weeks, I'd notice one of my plants looking sad. Droopy leaves, dry soil, that general "I've been neglected" vibe. I'd feel guilty, water it, promise myself I'd do better, and then... forget again. Repeat until plant death.
The thing is, I wasn't trying to neglect them. I'd walk past my plants every day. I'd notice them. I'd think "I should probably check if those need water." And then I'd get distracted by something and the thought would vanish.
This went on for longer than I'd like to admit.
The problem isn't memory
What I eventually realized: I wasn't forgetting my plants existed. I was forgetting to act at the right moment.
There's a difference.
I'd think about watering while brushing my teeth. While commuting. While in a meeting. Basically any moment when I couldn't actually do it. Then when I was home and near my plants, my brain was on to other things.
The solution wasn't to "try harder to remember." That doesn't work. The solution was to create triggers that caught me at moments when I could actually act.
What didn't work for me
Setting phone alarms. I tried setting an alarm for Sunday mornings: "Water plants." It would go off, I'd dismiss it because I was in the middle of something, and then forget. The problem with alarms is that they're easy to ignore in the moment and then they're gone.
Putting plants in visible places. My plants were already visible. I saw them constantly. But seeing them didn't trigger action. I'd notice them, think "those look fine" or "I'll check later," and move on.
Trying to remember which day I last watered. This was hopeless. By Wednesday, I couldn't remember if I'd watered on Saturday or the Saturday before. My memory for mundane recurring tasks is apparently terrible.
What actually helped
The shift came when I stopped relying on memory entirely.
Now I use an app (Beflore) that tracks when I water each plant. When I water something, I tap the widget on my phone's home screen. Takes two seconds. The app remembers so I don't have to.
But the tracking alone wasn't the breakthrough. The breakthrough was combining tracking with actual triggers.
Here's my system:
Morning coffee trigger. Every morning, while my coffee is brewing, I do a quick plant check. Not a thorough inspection, just a glance. Anything look droopy? Any soil look super dry? If yes, I water it and log it. If not, I move on.
This works because it's attached to something I already do every single day without fail. I'm not trying to remember "check plants." I'm just doing my morning routine, and plant checking is now part of it.
Sunday morning ritual. Once a week, I do a proper check of everything. Touch the soil, look for pests, water whatever needs it. This catches anything I missed during the week.
The app as backup. If I haven't logged watering for a plant in a while, I get a reminder. This catches the plants that somehow escape both my daily glance and weekly check.
Three layers. Any single one might fail on a given day, but all three failing? Rarely happens.
The two-second rule
Here's something I learned: if logging takes more than a few seconds, I won't do it consistently.
Early on, I tried using a notebook. It was in my living room. I'd water plants in the kitchen, think "I should write that down," not want to walk to the other room, tell myself I'd do it later, and forget.
Moving the notebook to the kitchen helped a bit, but then I had to find a pen, open to the right page, write the date, write which plant... too many steps.
The phone widget changed everything. I water a plant, I tap the widget, done. The app timestamps it automatically. I don't have to remember when, it remembers for me.
This sounds like a small thing, but it made the difference between a system I abandoned after two weeks and one I've been using for over a year.
What about plants with different schedules?
This used to confuse me. My succulent needs water every two weeks. My calathea needs it every few days. How do you keep track of all that?
The answer, for me, is that I don't really schedule watering anymore. I check frequently and water based on what I see, not based on a calendar.
The daily glance catches the thirsty plants. The weekly check catches everything else. The app keeps track of patterns so I can see if I'm watering too much or too little over time.
Some people prefer strict schedules, and that works for them. I found that checking often and responding to what I see works better for my brain. The key is having a system, not which system you pick.
Tips if you're just starting
If you've been struggling with this, here's what I'd suggest:
Pick one existing habit and attach plant checking to it. Coffee in the morning. Brushing teeth at night. Watching a specific TV show. Whatever you do every day without thinking. Make plant checking the thing that happens right before or after.
Start with just that one trigger. Don't try to build an elaborate system on day one. Get one trigger working consistently (takes about two weeks) before adding anything else.
Use an app or some other tracking method that's stupid easy. If there's friction, you'll stop. I use Beflore because the widget makes logging almost effortless, but even a simple note on your phone works if you'll actually use it.
Give yourself permission to not be perfect. Some weeks I miss the Sunday check. Some days I rush past my plants without really looking. The system catches most things. That's good enough. My plants are healthier than they've ever been, even though the system isn't flawless.
One more thing
If you're someone who "just can't keep plants alive," I want to offer some hope.
I thought I was that person. Turns out I was just someone who hadn't found a system that worked with my brain instead of against it.
Plants don't need much. Water when dry, light, occasional food. The hard part isn't the care itself. It's remembering to do it. Once I solved the remembering problem, everything else got easier.
You're probably not bad at plants. You just haven't found your system yet.
I use Beflore for tracking, but the important thing is finding something you'll actually stick with. An app you use beats a perfect system you don't.